Orson Scott Card makes a clear point in "Characters & Viewpoint" that your characters need to be interesting enough to have a story, but ordinary enough to be relatable and to avoid being over the top.
"[R]eaders tend to like a character who is at least superficially like themselves. But they quickly lose interest unless this particular character is somehow out of the ordinary. The character may wear the mask of the common man, but underneath his true face must always be the face of the hero." - Orson Scott Card
Okay, this is a funny post you might enjoy about a female writer trying to write a realistic guy:
http://blog.liviablackburne.com/2011/02/on-writing-realistic-male-characters.html
Here's one website on writing from the POV of the opposite gender:
http://learnasyouwrite.com/how-to-write-pov-for-the-opposite-sex/
I think sometimes we use the stereotypes too much, and other times I think they can help us - because sometimes stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason.
Character Development Writing Exercises:
http://www.pgtc.com/~slmiller/characterexercises.htm
http://writerstrust.blogspot.com/2007/10/character-development-exercises.html
This is a fun little step-by-step get-to-know-you-character exercise I found:
http://www.wikihow.com/Create-a-Realistic-Fiction-Character
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